37days ago I travelled 30hours alone all the way to Sydney, with utmost anticipation and love. 37 days later today, I woke up alone in this sky-level capsule, filled with sweet memories and laughter, yet alongside with tears and emptiness deep in that top left corner of my chest. It’s been a dream, the best best sweetest dream. 37days sound very long, but when it comes to happy memories, it’s just never long enough. They came and left like a flash, too real to be unreal, but too unreal that you know it’s real. You know those memories truly happened. But, bae, tears kept coming down, unstoppable and unlimited.
37days, 24/7 – the longest time we’ve been together. In these 37days, I never wanted to stay a step away from you. Even when you were sleeping or away for class, as long as I knew you were coming back, I never felt lonely. All I wanted was you, you and you. I missed waking you up with kisses, urging you to have breakfast with me; I missed putting my best makeup and dressing up, making sure I looked eyecandy to you; I missed holding hands in lectures; missed waiting for you in the library, and seeing you running to me like we’ve been apart for long; missed having someone stuffing me food, always worrying about me being underweight; missed how you measure my waist with your arm, ensuring me that I did not gain any fat, even though I already noticed that round of fat slowly accumulated around my tummy; missed walking home together, while counting stars that looked much brighter with you beside me; missed how you play with my 71cm hair so happily that you look literally like a kid with his toys; missed brushing teeth together, you pretending my enjoyable face, head on one side and eyes closed; missed you stroking my head to sleep; missed us hugging until the other morning. Statistics say one forms a habit within 27days. 37days for us, is probably too much then. I can’t live without you anymore. I missed how you treat me your girl, holding me like the pearl in your palm. Starting from yesterday, everything seemed too fast to be caught, and I started to breathe so hard. The feeling of leaving you was choking me, making me unable to support myself to stand. I am already missing you so badly.
If there’s somewhere I can be, that’ll be Sydney, for sure. It even feels more like my second home than the UK. Your family, the babies, my Aussie squad, your really welcoming friends, #bff Francesca and you. Nothing feels better than that. Nothing feels warmer than having every one of you come and ask me to come back soon. I would if I could. Too warm that it actually makes me cry every time you guys do that, you know who you are. Thanks, Thanks, Thanks for hosting me like I’ve always been part of you all. Thanks for making me feel like I’ve never left. Thanks for loving me.
My dear bae, these 37days've been like home. I promise all the memories will be engraved in my heart, and if you forget one day, I’m always up to remind you. That home in the future, you got to be there. Without you, my home is nothing. I've always kept that place on my right for you, my love, so stay close always will you?
My heart aches baby. But it’s okay, I guess, it probably takes a while to heal again. So used to be together, yet also so used to be being apart – that’s LDR, such a torturing love-hate relationship, isn’t it? BabyZ, the next time you see me in Sydney, you’ll be wearing my graduation presents, with your gown and cap, and I’ll be in my best outfit, walking to you with your personalized graduation bouquet and BuBuJit teddy. Wait for me there, it’s gonna be soon, real soon.
Last but not least, of course, my dear hubby.
Dear Sydney, if there's somewhere I'll be, that'll be here. Stay Good, will be back soon.
PS. Stay tuned for many more awesome #FollowDearPostmanToSydney posts.
PPS. I really really miss you.
Love you always and see you on my Facetime (pray for a better network).
PPPS. miss you badly - Z